School Inspection Day!

Back then, a day that generated ample humor was the “School Inspection Day”. For an entire week, the school authorities worked overtime. The reputation of the school hinged on the assessment by the inspector. Classrooms were cleaned up and new charts and banners went up. The trophies got a polish and shone like cut diamonds! It looked like a different school.

Classes were shuffled. All the “bright” boys were packed in one class, and the plan was to cleverly steer the inspector to that class. It increased the probability of getting a favorable assessment. Each year, it was an exciting time.

Often, the D-day ended in a whimper when nothing happened! We learnt that the inspector visited a different class. It was as if we eagerly waited for the storm, only to find that it changed its course! Sometimes, he was pampered in the staffroom, with platefuls of samosa and halwa, with the result he was too contented to conduct any assessment! Or after the binge, he had to spend extended time in the restroom for the rest of the day. Fact and fiction were interwoven when it came to student tales.

Once, the inspector did come to class. We expected him to look like a police-inspector- with a pistol hanging off his belt! But the person who walked in was a genial, elderly man. He sat on the teacher’s chair while our teacher stood nervously beside. His question was probing- “What is the difference between condensation and evaporation?” He picked Sridhar to answer.

Sridhar went blank. He stood for an eternity, his face totally red. The class teacher had tension writ on her face. The inspector waited. Finally, Sridhar blurted out, “In condensation, the thing condenses. In evaporation, the thing evaporates.” It was a thought-provoking answer and the students giggled under their breath. Any reaction was fraught with danger- it could enrage the inspector or the teacher. Or the next question could come our way, and we were no better.

But the inspector was a seasoned veteran. He said, “You are right!” He explained the terms elaborately, glancing at the class teacher from time to time, who readily agreed with whatever he said.

Once the inspector left, everyone heaved a sigh of relief. We surrounded Sridhar- he had come out battle-bruised, but victorious. “I forgot everything!” Sridhar admitted. It did not matter. We hoisted him on our shoulders. He had heroically saved the day!

As we spin the hands of time, it comes to rest on some such nondescript event. An event that happened many moons ago, which generates many a chuckle now! Modern day school and corporate audits are no different- they follow the same time-tested appraisal procedure!