Tuesday 19 April 2011

My angle on the line

Aryabhatta's treatise "Aryabhatia" involves computation of areas and volumes. I'm sure ancient India was well versed in Geometry. But some where, down the line, we seem to have completely lost the plot. If you're following my line of thought, what baffles me is how the average Indian pretends as if he is clueless when it comes to following a line.

You can check the ticket counter at the railway station, the help desk at the airport (if there is one), the counter at the grocery store or even the teller at the bank.
If there is one human being sitting at a desk with a job to service clients, we believe that it is our duty to make the job as challenging as we can! Bigger the desk, more the people all around it. Queuing Theory just doesn't work here. This is a different science altogether where marcovian distribution and wait times don't stand a chance. The person at the desk has to be an  ashtavadhani or possibly even a shatavadhani to be able to service a barrage of simultaneous challenges from every direction.  Abhimanyu should have trained here. He would have had a better chance of emerging triumphant from the chakra vyuha! The person with the  longest hand or the one with the loudest voice wins the service request.

If ever there is a line (queue if you like the word better) which leads to this chaos (after all, not everyone can be alongside the desk), then a different set of challenges awaits you. Firstly, you need to be alert and vigilant like a jawan at the LOC. If you're slightly off-guard, you'll find a different set of trousers in front of you. By then, it's too late to pick up a quarrel. That's the price you pay for dreaming.

If  you do manage to catch the set of trousers who is about to jump the line in front of you, he'll snarl back at you. The look is supposed to mean one of two things: "Of course, you can get service before me. Why do you assume that I am trying to jump the queue? I'm just standing in front of you." Look number two would mean: "Why on earth do you need to maintain so much distance between yourself and the trouser before you ? You're supposed to stand like conjoined twins!"

The brigand of the third variety is the one who says that I just have a single item to buy. Hence, getting first preference at the counter is my birthright and I shall have it. It flies in the face of logic to argue with this gentleman. He will make you feel as if you belong to the dregs of human society who has no ounce of compassion. Surprisingly, the person at the counter as well as others in my line threw their weight around him rather than seeing sense in my argument. Perhaps, I'm wrong.

There have been times when I've been surprised to see a line and a working one at that. You normally keep track of just the pair of trousers in front of you and drop your guard momentarily. You hum a tune to yourself and feel that the world couldn't have been any better. The dream is cut short summarily when you find that the trouser in front of you didn't mean to be in the line at all. He's been busy looking at the Arrivals and Departures on the overhead display and simply walks away! You kick yourself to find that scores of others have walked past this bloke, formed another line, got serviced and are out of this race! You know the feeling.

India moves on. Bollywood comes up with complicated triangles. People have many square meals a day. The golden quadrilateral is almost complete. But do we know to form a line ? Even if a  special task force from the Pentagon were given a charter to make us fall in line, they will miserably fail and will be running around in circles. I hope you get my point!

5 comments:

  1. Really funny...all we can do is being sarcastic about things and walk away last right?? May be at the most blog it for other such fellows to sympathise..emphathise...:)

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  2. Usha, Agree with you that we are not Anna Hazare to change the system (even *he* is just trying!) But, if we see the humour, may be we'll be insulated and to that extent will be less irritated! That's a battle won.. at the personal level at least.

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  3. I think mostly (atleast 50%) moral responsibility comes from house/school/social group in which we are brought up.

    Giving bribe is equal offense as taking, silently watching of breaking law( which inlcudes social norms) is equivalent to doing it.
    So when we see it, atleast we need to go and eduate that person who broke it :), we need not fight and create a scene, with smile also we can educate.
    May be it is good opportunity to know a stranger too :).
    So next time we see breaking norms, will go and say hi friend how about having a conversation for a minute :)

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  4. Sunita, It all depends on who the stranger is ! On the basis of that, we will be either over enthusiastic in picking up a conversation (might even forget the thought of correcting!) or beating a hasty retreat! It all depends!!

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  5. Good one Shankar.
    I am sure everyone has experienced the same in India, and people learn or lets say wish to follow the crowd.
    In fact as a child we might have learnt this attitude by looking at what parents do or what society does.

    So unless we want to change ourselves-No Anna Hazare or any law or anyone can do anything.

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