What should I read?

I have not read a book for decades! I made sincere attempts, but some obstacle made me drop it! Several books fell by the wayside- I barely got past the first chapter!

Opinions are varied when it comes to the choice of books. If I picked a book on fiction, someone commented, “Why would you read fiction? It is not even real! If you must read, read the classics! Have you read Shakespeare and Milton? When will you read them?” He said it with such urgency, as though I had wasted my entire life!  And now, like catching a runaway train, there was not one moment to lose!

I bought the complete works of the Master- a hardbound edition. But let’s face it. Archaic English is not easy- Thy and Thine holdeth thou hostage. Barely two pages into the book, I was yawning uncontrollably. It was no disrespect to the Master- rather, it was my incompetence, both in language and comprehension.

With the classics cast away, I turned to History. Comments were quick- “Objective History is an oxymoron! The same character from one viewpoint is a hero, and from another standpoint, supremely controversial! That you must read History so that it does not repeat, does not hold water! Our current times are ample proof!”

I moved on to Cosmology- a whole universe filled with wonder. All the galaxies out there, the blackholes and nebulae, the supernovas and what not. The problem with this genre is that there is no number less than a billion anywhere. Everything is in billions and trillions and lightyears! I was racked with enormous doubt- how did they even count all this?

Books on sports seemed a great choice. Who doesn’t like a Dravid versus Goliath story? Just when I got to the chapter on the World Cup finals, Mr. Dampener came along- “These sportsmen have some skill in the game. But how does it help you? Buddy, read something that will build your personality!”

Self-Help books are littered everywhere. As I was about to purchase, the man on the aisle commented wryly, “Don’t know if the book helped anyone! It helped the author! He made millions- and surely stopped worrying and started living, a king-sized life!”

I got the best advice from my dear friend. He asked me, “Aren’t you a writer? Then, you must never read! If you read, you will be influenced by other writers! How will you develop your style?” With his fist, he tapped my heart repeatedly- “What does it say? You write what it says! Then, the words will have life!”

I followed his sage advice and stayed unlettered, and free from all guilt!